Musing on......results

This life wasn't meant to be perfect. If we got everything we wanted exactly when we wanted it, it would be paradise. There are some things in life we will have to wait for to have fulfilled - either later than we wanted them, or in the next life - it will be worth it inshaAllah. All we can really do to get the things we want is work for them, pray for them, and trust in Allah.  Real satisfaction, success and happiness in this life comes from working hard, doing the right thing and knowing you've done your best, not necessarily results. It's the next life that's about permanent results.

The first time it really sank in that being fantastically skilled at something is not a prerequisite for enjoying it was when I did literacy tutoring with an elderly lady with a learning disability. Every week, we would go through the same process of going over the alphabet and some simple words - and she struggled, but every week, she enjoyed the task, and her smile was genuine and almost constant. She enjoyed learning and she enjoyed the company - one time she even started clapping with happiness when I came into the room!

The thing is, we tend to idealise the end products, the 'results' of our dreams - even though, once we have them, because of a variety of reasons, they're not usually as wonderful as we expected - maybe they don't last, or we change and don't want them any more, or they weren't something that was good for us (the list could go on indefinitely)

It's so easy to miss out on life and its opportunities by wishing it away. It's easier said than done, but I think it's become more and more important for me to realise that I need to focus on the things in my control and appreciate and make the most of what I have, and not put things on hold on the off chance that it will interfere with something that might happen.

Post Eid check in

Salaam,

I hope people had an amazing Ramadan and Eid inshaAllah. I definitely did alhamdulillah :)

Shortly after Eid, I received a message from one of the matrimonial sites I'm signed up to (slightly edited to protect identities lol) - "Eid Mubarak. What are the chances of finding another muslim in your city to marry at your age?"

It really got to me that someone would go out of their way to send a message like this. What was the point? Anyway, I sent a reply basically saying that Allah knows best what will happen, and duas wishing him success in his search for a spouse etc.

I am in one of those phases right now where I can accept that marriage might not be a feature in my life. The thought still hurts, and I won't pretend that I don't feel like it's something I need or want, but I feel like I can deal with it because what's the alternative - wallow in self pity and not get anywhere in life? The time has, I think,  come in my life where I'll have to keep a cool head and plough through the things I have to do and want to achieve, ignoring the doubts and addressing the issues as I go along, insha'Allah.

Who knows, maybe my role is even to be a wake up call to other women to have goals, achieve in life and get married as young as they feel ready to, 

Last few days of Ramadan

Salaam

There are precious few nights left of Ramadan - any of these last few nights could be Laylatul Qadr, where everybody wants to maximise the good they can do but a lot of people don't have much time - donating by text can be a good option, e.g in the UK, text DONATE to 70000 to donate £5 to DEC or SYRI44 £10 to 70070 Syria: Make Bread Not War appeal via human appeal international or FIGHT to 70111 to give £3 to Cancer Research. More codes to donate via the links below

http://www.dec.org.uk/faq (list of codes under "What are the terms and conditions for text to donate?

http://humanappeal.org.uk/donate/donate_mobile.htm 

http://www.cancerresearchuk.org/about-us/utilities/terms-and-conditions/text-to-donate/

And a couple of links to lectures on Laylatul Qadr

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5Oam2qJz0y8

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Put8Cd1evbU

I'll be doing dua for my readers - please remember me in your prayers too. JazakAllah khayr.